20 years ago, I was reconsidering the course of my life. I wasn't happy with my salary, I wasn't happy with my love life, and I was feeling the need for some change.
I had moved back to Norfolk from Houston, a little over a year after my father died and we settled his 'estate' (paid off the bills, sold the house, sold the boat, split up the stuff...) I was working in a law office, and while I made good friends there, I never cared for the stuffy environment as compared to the "we're all in this together" style of working that I had experienced in Houston. I was working a lot of overtime. I had a cute little duplex near the Chesapeake Bay and a dog and a cat.
One of the things I considered at this time was moving to DC and working with some attorneys that I had known in Houston. They took me to lunch, and I scouted possible areas to live based on an estimated salary for a legal secretary in DC. While I was intrigued at the possibility of working with these guys (we all got along great), the DC life didn't appeal. I'd just left a big city and while it was fun for a while, I was over it.
So, I declined that opportunity. Then I briefly considered the military, as a way of getting an education. I distinctly remember talking to my mother about this, along with her tips on changing my diet to lower my cholesterol (my father had died in '86, massive heart attack.)
But a few days later I was asked by a co-worker if I would be willing to go on a blind date. Her husband had three buddies who wanted dates for the Hawkeye Ball. The Hawkeye is the E2C, the "eyes" of the aircraft carrier, first planes out, last retrieved. The guys were getting home from a six month cruise the day of the ball. And that's how I met my future husband. And why I didn't join the military. (Really, I considered that...?!)
This comes up because Rebecca recently asked how I'd met her dad. And it had dawned on me earlier this summer, that was 20 years ago. It is incredible to me that so much time has passed. And Rebecca has asked me, "Are you sorry you married Daddy?" Well of course not. We shared some real adventures together, and have a beautiful and loving daughter who is well on her way to becoming a pretty amazing young adult.
It all leads us to where we are now. No regrets. But wow, 20 years ago...
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Summer of Love
This will probably read more like a rambling than a coherent blog post.
Just a coincidence that this year marks the 40th anniverary of the quintessential lovefest, Woodstock. Didn't make sense to struggle with something so insignificant as the title of this blog post, so there it is.
Feeling very alive lately. Nerves right at the top of my skin. Awareness heightened to a ridiculous level: words mean more, music affects me more profoundly, and tears come more easily. My heart feels very open right now. And on top of all of this, I feel calm. Peaceful. Nothing significant has happened. I noticed a difference earlier in the summer, like I'd turned some kind of emotional corner. Hard to explain, but the feeling has held in any case. And yes, this does sound a lot like the "twitterpated" feeling discussed in the spring. I suppose in a way that's what this is, but more twitterpated with life, living, and love (not the sappy stuff, the real stuff, the enduring love of real connections...)
I do know this: I have connected and reconnected with so many extraordinary people and friends over the summer.
SUUSI, of course, is always an experience in connections. No need to go into that again, but it definitely grounded me and gave me a renewed sense of self.
The reunion in Norfolk was almost magical. Friends and acquaintances I hadn't seen in over 30 years, all together for a weekend at a beach house. We exchanged stories, memories, joys and sorrows. We came together from all the different places we'd been scattered, both geographically and in our life's journeys; we have different political views, different religious backgrounds, and yet we enjoyed food, drink, music and dancing, and came away with a renewed sense of where we come from and a deeper connection to each other. Now there is talk of making this an annual event. I hope so.
And at home, in our little town, it seems that some fences are being mended, and misunderstandings forgiven. There have been many occasions for deep connections and strengthening of friendships. Even the most cynical among us has felt the love. I can't attribute it to anything specific. But I do know that it makes me happy. I have friends in my life who 'get' me, and that is priceless. They recognize things in me that I forget, and they remind me. They gently encourage me to be kinder to myself, to love myself. And I am so very grateful.
And I know, the one constant in our lives is change. Impermanance. Nothing lasts forever. I'm about to turn 50. Not sure what the future holds. All the more reason, then, to embrace the now. My heart is open, my mind is open, and nothing really matters but right now.
Just a coincidence that this year marks the 40th anniverary of the quintessential lovefest, Woodstock. Didn't make sense to struggle with something so insignificant as the title of this blog post, so there it is.
Feeling very alive lately. Nerves right at the top of my skin. Awareness heightened to a ridiculous level: words mean more, music affects me more profoundly, and tears come more easily. My heart feels very open right now. And on top of all of this, I feel calm. Peaceful. Nothing significant has happened. I noticed a difference earlier in the summer, like I'd turned some kind of emotional corner. Hard to explain, but the feeling has held in any case. And yes, this does sound a lot like the "twitterpated" feeling discussed in the spring. I suppose in a way that's what this is, but more twitterpated with life, living, and love (not the sappy stuff, the real stuff, the enduring love of real connections...)
I do know this: I have connected and reconnected with so many extraordinary people and friends over the summer.
SUUSI, of course, is always an experience in connections. No need to go into that again, but it definitely grounded me and gave me a renewed sense of self.
The reunion in Norfolk was almost magical. Friends and acquaintances I hadn't seen in over 30 years, all together for a weekend at a beach house. We exchanged stories, memories, joys and sorrows. We came together from all the different places we'd been scattered, both geographically and in our life's journeys; we have different political views, different religious backgrounds, and yet we enjoyed food, drink, music and dancing, and came away with a renewed sense of where we come from and a deeper connection to each other. Now there is talk of making this an annual event. I hope so.
And at home, in our little town, it seems that some fences are being mended, and misunderstandings forgiven. There have been many occasions for deep connections and strengthening of friendships. Even the most cynical among us has felt the love. I can't attribute it to anything specific. But I do know that it makes me happy. I have friends in my life who 'get' me, and that is priceless. They recognize things in me that I forget, and they remind me. They gently encourage me to be kinder to myself, to love myself. And I am so very grateful.
And I know, the one constant in our lives is change. Impermanance. Nothing lasts forever. I'm about to turn 50. Not sure what the future holds. All the more reason, then, to embrace the now. My heart is open, my mind is open, and nothing really matters but right now.
Saturday, August 1, 2009
My Summer Vacation
The dog days of summer have arrived. This area has been blessed with great weather this summer, so we were bound to pay eventually. Fortunately, the weather stayed amazingly nice through our vacation at SUUSI (Southeast Unitarian Universalist Summer Institute) at Radford. It was downright chilly at night, my three hikes were all very comfortable, and when it did rain it was brief and welcome.
This was our second year at SUUSI. It was our first staying in separate dorms, and I have to say, I am very proud of Rebecca. Even though she had a 1 a.m. curfew and most of her friends stayed out/up as late as they possibly could (some stayed in the common room all night long), she had the good sense to get to bed by midnight most nights. Good to know she has her own mind and doesn't feel the need to follow the crowd. I hope that remains to be a part of her character. She had a great time, cultivated some old and new friendships, and was completely thrilled with participating in Teens Way Off Broadway. She even took a Making Truffles workshop (they were yummy!) My dorm experience was great: my room mate and I got along famously, our suitemates were nice and very considerate...I barely noticed we were sharing a bathroom with them. We stayed in a quiet hall, so sleeping was never a problem. And most nights we could sleep with the windows open, thanks to the cool temperatures.
I enjoyed my time immensely. I was in a very mellow, calm mood, which made for a very positive experience. I worked in the nursery for part of the time, and really enjoyed holding the babies and generally helping out with lots of other amazing volunteers. What a well-run operation (SUUSI in general, and the youth program in particular.) I also participated in the Fun Run (run by friend Bill Brooks) and finished, approx. a 13 min. mile. Good enough, but I wouldn't call it fun...
The three hikes I participated in were all enjoyable and unique in their own way. The first was to the Falls of Dismal. Beautiful area, but a very short hike to the falls, so several of us went on to hike on a path above the falls and saw some beautiful scenery and had some nice conversations.
The next hike originated at Mountain Lake, the site where much of Dirty Dancing was filmed. There was a fog on this morning, which made the temps very nice. We hiked a fairly steep path (had to rest several times) up to Bald Knob, which I believe is one of the highest points in this part of Virginia.
Unfortunately, our view was obstructed by the fog, but still an exhilarating accomplishment. We went on from there and hiked to Bear Cliffs. This was a gorgeous area, and I was fortunate to be walking with a woman well-versed in botany, which helped in identifying many of the plants along the way.
Bear Cliffs is a fairly treacherous area, with deep chasms and large crags of rock. Most of the rock is very slippery, and two in our party took a fall. Not an area to be treated lightly.
Amazingly, one of our party had just turned 80 in February. While his going was slow, he accomplished the hike and we were all supportive and encouraging. Good for him!! The highlight of the nature portion of my SUUSI experience was the Travertine Falls Silent Hike. The hike was conceived by one of the Nature staff, Dave Shellman. He had experienced a hike last year during which one participant talked non-stop. He thought it might be nice to lead a hike that was based on silence, immersing the participants in their surroundings. Well, it was a huge hit. Everyone who signed up did so specifically because it was billed as 'silent.' We determined the parameters (no talking zone, time to meet back, etc.) and were on our way.
Oh, the things you can see when you have the freedom to be silent, stop, sit, go back, and contemplate. Truly a wonderful experience, and the bonding seemed even more deep without the talking. Thanks, Dave.
The rest of my time at SUUSI remained fairly open. Outside of set dining times (which were very accommodating) I had no real agenda. I attended a few theme talks and worship services, always a great experience and very grounding, I attended several of the concerts (great talent there), and did a little shopping at the SUUSI store and Artisan's Bazaar. In the afternoons we would gather in the quad for community time, sharing our thoughts on the day, the services, the weather, and just generally enjoying each other. Our circle invariably grew, as folks stopped by to say hello, and we all made new friends this way. We would often gather back in this area after dinner, and on a couple of occasions talked and laughed (oh how we laughed!) into the night.
And several nights I would end up at Serendipity, for cocktails and dancing. One night as I walked home, I came upon a labyrinth that had been set up by a participant, lined with white lights. I dropped my shoes and walked the labyrinth, enjoyed the coolness and moisture of the grass, and welcoming the tranquility of 1 a.m., after the thumping of the music and dancing. Lovely way to end the night.
When it was time to come home, Rebecca and I were both ready. We loved the week and we look forward to next year. But home is a good place to be. I've always felt that vacation is good for that...helping me to appreciate home. There's no place like home. See you next year, SUUSI...thanks for the wonderful week and unforgettable moments.
This was our second year at SUUSI. It was our first staying in separate dorms, and I have to say, I am very proud of Rebecca. Even though she had a 1 a.m. curfew and most of her friends stayed out/up as late as they possibly could (some stayed in the common room all night long), she had the good sense to get to bed by midnight most nights. Good to know she has her own mind and doesn't feel the need to follow the crowd. I hope that remains to be a part of her character. She had a great time, cultivated some old and new friendships, and was completely thrilled with participating in Teens Way Off Broadway. She even took a Making Truffles workshop (they were yummy!) My dorm experience was great: my room mate and I got along famously, our suitemates were nice and very considerate...I barely noticed we were sharing a bathroom with them. We stayed in a quiet hall, so sleeping was never a problem. And most nights we could sleep with the windows open, thanks to the cool temperatures.
I enjoyed my time immensely. I was in a very mellow, calm mood, which made for a very positive experience. I worked in the nursery for part of the time, and really enjoyed holding the babies and generally helping out with lots of other amazing volunteers. What a well-run operation (SUUSI in general, and the youth program in particular.) I also participated in the Fun Run (run by friend Bill Brooks) and finished, approx. a 13 min. mile. Good enough, but I wouldn't call it fun...
The three hikes I participated in were all enjoyable and unique in their own way. The first was to the Falls of Dismal. Beautiful area, but a very short hike to the falls, so several of us went on to hike on a path above the falls and saw some beautiful scenery and had some nice conversations.
The next hike originated at Mountain Lake, the site where much of Dirty Dancing was filmed. There was a fog on this morning, which made the temps very nice. We hiked a fairly steep path (had to rest several times) up to Bald Knob, which I believe is one of the highest points in this part of Virginia.
Unfortunately, our view was obstructed by the fog, but still an exhilarating accomplishment. We went on from there and hiked to Bear Cliffs. This was a gorgeous area, and I was fortunate to be walking with a woman well-versed in botany, which helped in identifying many of the plants along the way.
Bear Cliffs is a fairly treacherous area, with deep chasms and large crags of rock. Most of the rock is very slippery, and two in our party took a fall. Not an area to be treated lightly.
Amazingly, one of our party had just turned 80 in February. While his going was slow, he accomplished the hike and we were all supportive and encouraging. Good for him!! The highlight of the nature portion of my SUUSI experience was the Travertine Falls Silent Hike. The hike was conceived by one of the Nature staff, Dave Shellman. He had experienced a hike last year during which one participant talked non-stop. He thought it might be nice to lead a hike that was based on silence, immersing the participants in their surroundings. Well, it was a huge hit. Everyone who signed up did so specifically because it was billed as 'silent.' We determined the parameters (no talking zone, time to meet back, etc.) and were on our way.
Oh, the things you can see when you have the freedom to be silent, stop, sit, go back, and contemplate. Truly a wonderful experience, and the bonding seemed even more deep without the talking. Thanks, Dave.
The rest of my time at SUUSI remained fairly open. Outside of set dining times (which were very accommodating) I had no real agenda. I attended a few theme talks and worship services, always a great experience and very grounding, I attended several of the concerts (great talent there), and did a little shopping at the SUUSI store and Artisan's Bazaar. In the afternoons we would gather in the quad for community time, sharing our thoughts on the day, the services, the weather, and just generally enjoying each other. Our circle invariably grew, as folks stopped by to say hello, and we all made new friends this way. We would often gather back in this area after dinner, and on a couple of occasions talked and laughed (oh how we laughed!) into the night.
And several nights I would end up at Serendipity, for cocktails and dancing. One night as I walked home, I came upon a labyrinth that had been set up by a participant, lined with white lights. I dropped my shoes and walked the labyrinth, enjoyed the coolness and moisture of the grass, and welcoming the tranquility of 1 a.m., after the thumping of the music and dancing. Lovely way to end the night.When it was time to come home, Rebecca and I were both ready. We loved the week and we look forward to next year. But home is a good place to be. I've always felt that vacation is good for that...helping me to appreciate home. There's no place like home. See you next year, SUUSI...thanks for the wonderful week and unforgettable moments.
Friday, July 17, 2009
Life Is Good
Life in general is pretty darn good. Things at work are a little busier, which helps me feel more productive and valuable. Social life has been very busy, always picks up in the summer. Lots of fun with friends, and lots of good music. Romantic life remains static, but that has a tendency to work out best when I don't pay it a lot of attention. Rebecca is enjoying her summer, a good combination so far of busy times interspersed with down time. She's a great help around the house and a joy to live with! Meanwhile, ...
...we're heading out for our second annual trip to Radford to attend SUUSI: Southeastern Unitarian Universalist Summer Institute -- church camp. But not just any church camp. For seven days, UUs from all over the country (and some from outside the country...) gather together to share joys, sorrows, fun, worship, discussions, music, dancing, art, and community. For those seven days, we will be the only folks on the Radford campus besides the summer staff.
Last year, I took a yoga class and did one hike. I attended a couple of worship services (done by some of the who's who of UU) and did a whole lot of late night tipping and dancing. Rebecca and I roomed together in the family dorm, and we both made new friends and had a great time.
This year, I plan to do a fun run and three hikes, and am working in the nursery part-time. Rebecca will be staying in the teen dorm with a friend she made last year, and I will be staying in the adult dorm :) We are both looking forward to the freedom and fun.
SUUSI has been the answer to what has been a difficult decision for us each year: what to do for vacation that engages both of us and allows us each to have fun with folks in our peer groups. It is perfect. Life is good.
...we're heading out for our second annual trip to Radford to attend SUUSI: Southeastern Unitarian Universalist Summer Institute -- church camp. But not just any church camp. For seven days, UUs from all over the country (and some from outside the country...) gather together to share joys, sorrows, fun, worship, discussions, music, dancing, art, and community. For those seven days, we will be the only folks on the Radford campus besides the summer staff.
Last year, I took a yoga class and did one hike. I attended a couple of worship services (done by some of the who's who of UU) and did a whole lot of late night tipping and dancing. Rebecca and I roomed together in the family dorm, and we both made new friends and had a great time.
This year, I plan to do a fun run and three hikes, and am working in the nursery part-time. Rebecca will be staying in the teen dorm with a friend she made last year, and I will be staying in the adult dorm :) We are both looking forward to the freedom and fun.
SUUSI has been the answer to what has been a difficult decision for us each year: what to do for vacation that engages both of us and allows us each to have fun with folks in our peer groups. It is perfect. Life is good.
Friday, July 10, 2009
Charlie Bean
And speaking of friendship, just heard from my old friend Chuck yesterday. Chuck and I go back to high school, Norview High School in Norfolk, VA. He dated one of my best friends. He was one of my best friends, too. We knew he had a temper, since one night after he and Denise fought he put a hole in the bedroom door where she was staying at my dad's house. Dad was none too happy about it. Chuck was one of those whose mouth and temper got the better of him when he was drinking.
Chuck also lived in Houston for part of the time I was there. We lived in the same apartment complex. I remember one night, after having a few (okay, several) drinks at the bar next door (I believe it was called Amore...), we started walking home in the rain. We ran into someone I knew, and we started chatting. Apparently Chuck stepped into some mud, but whatever the case, the whole time I was chatting with the neighbor, I could hear Chuck floundering around in the bushes, and I'm chatting as though nothing in the world is wrong. The neighbor moved on, and Chuck and I laughed our asses off all the way back to our apartments.
Anyhow, about 11 years ago Chuck got himself into trouble. This wasn't his first brush with the law, but it's the one that put him into jail for 20 years. Apparently his temper and drinking set him off once again, and he drew a knife on some guy at a party. Bad enough, but when the cops came, Chuck brandished the knife at one of them. You just don't do that. So, Chuck has been bouncing around between various Virginia correctional facilities, depending on how well he behaves. He's currently not too far away (near Farmville) and I may try to go and see him.
Meanwhile, Chuck's daughter has grown to be a young lady of 15. She hardly knows her dad, he hardly knows her; in fact, he hasn't seen her in a year. Chuck wrote that his mom is coming to visit, and will be bringing his daughter with her. I am so glad he gets to see them both.
Do I feel sorry for Chuck? Yes, I kind of do. He never got the help he needed, and he wasn't enlightened enough to know how to get it. He'll never get that help in the system. He will supposedly get out in nine more years. Wow. I can't imagine losing 20 years of my life, not seeing my daughter grow up, realizing my mother is old and has serious health problems, not seeing my siblings, or my friends. I know he 'brought this on himself', but I also know his problems were fixable, and I think it's a shame he will have served 20 years, when there are so many out on the street now who have done so much worse than Chuck did.
So, I heard from "my favorite convict" (as Chuck likes to call himself) yesterday, and I owe him a letter, possibly a visit. He's still my friend, Bean as I used to call him (short for Charlie Bean, not sure why...) See you soon, Chuck.
Chuck also lived in Houston for part of the time I was there. We lived in the same apartment complex. I remember one night, after having a few (okay, several) drinks at the bar next door (I believe it was called Amore...), we started walking home in the rain. We ran into someone I knew, and we started chatting. Apparently Chuck stepped into some mud, but whatever the case, the whole time I was chatting with the neighbor, I could hear Chuck floundering around in the bushes, and I'm chatting as though nothing in the world is wrong. The neighbor moved on, and Chuck and I laughed our asses off all the way back to our apartments.
Anyhow, about 11 years ago Chuck got himself into trouble. This wasn't his first brush with the law, but it's the one that put him into jail for 20 years. Apparently his temper and drinking set him off once again, and he drew a knife on some guy at a party. Bad enough, but when the cops came, Chuck brandished the knife at one of them. You just don't do that. So, Chuck has been bouncing around between various Virginia correctional facilities, depending on how well he behaves. He's currently not too far away (near Farmville) and I may try to go and see him.
Meanwhile, Chuck's daughter has grown to be a young lady of 15. She hardly knows her dad, he hardly knows her; in fact, he hasn't seen her in a year. Chuck wrote that his mom is coming to visit, and will be bringing his daughter with her. I am so glad he gets to see them both.
Do I feel sorry for Chuck? Yes, I kind of do. He never got the help he needed, and he wasn't enlightened enough to know how to get it. He'll never get that help in the system. He will supposedly get out in nine more years. Wow. I can't imagine losing 20 years of my life, not seeing my daughter grow up, realizing my mother is old and has serious health problems, not seeing my siblings, or my friends. I know he 'brought this on himself', but I also know his problems were fixable, and I think it's a shame he will have served 20 years, when there are so many out on the street now who have done so much worse than Chuck did.
So, I heard from "my favorite convict" (as Chuck likes to call himself) yesterday, and I owe him a letter, possibly a visit. He's still my friend, Bean as I used to call him (short for Charlie Bean, not sure why...) See you soon, Chuck.
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Fickled Fate of Friendship
It's about friendship. You see, I'm a sensitive girl. I know, I don't come off that way, that's a defense mechanism, and you know it. But some friendships really matter to me. So when a friend goes away or disappears, I tend to feel a tad blue and worry what happened. I know, don't take it personally. But what if it *does* have something to do with me? I think I'd like to know. I think I'd want to make amends and/or talk it out. When we're not given that explanation, then the ends are left hanging, dangling out there. That's unpleasant. I'm a believer in open, honest communication. I don't like games, or mixed messages, or unanswered questions. It makes me feel confused and frustrated, and sad. Ugh.
But on another note, also to do with friendship, I have some amazing friends. Spent an excellent weekend with lots of them, old and new. Come Monday I was exhausted, but it was a lot of fun right up through midnight Sunday. And my daughter had a fun weekend with a friend and her family at Westmoreland, so Sunday night when we finally got together again, she was all chatty about her weekend, and we talked and talked, just like friends. Obviously I love my daughter; but I also really, really like her. She is turning into a pretty awesome human being, and I am so very blessed to have her in my life.
But on another note, also to do with friendship, I have some amazing friends. Spent an excellent weekend with lots of them, old and new. Come Monday I was exhausted, but it was a lot of fun right up through midnight Sunday. And my daughter had a fun weekend with a friend and her family at Westmoreland, so Sunday night when we finally got together again, she was all chatty about her weekend, and we talked and talked, just like friends. Obviously I love my daughter; but I also really, really like her. She is turning into a pretty awesome human being, and I am so very blessed to have her in my life.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Organizational Therapy
I'm a neat person by nature. I've always been a 'picker upper' -- I don't like clutter, it makes me feel muddled and out of control. So, I pick up and put away...a lot. When people come to my home, they usually make some comment about how clean my house is, and I always correct them. Because my house isn't clean; I hate to clean. But I'm usually putting things in their place, which gives the appearance of clean. And I'm okay with that.
One of the things I thought I might do as a side business involves helping people get rid of the clutter in their lives. I would call it Organizational Therapy, because it can be therapeutic to get rid of clutter. However, I realized that helping someone get rid of clutter can be a delicate matter. You have to be very aware that their clutter has meaning to them, and getting rid of it can be a slow and sometimes painful process. So, I shelved (pardon the pun) that idea for a business, because I need a better awareness into people's psyche than I actually have.
So, I stick to my own clutter. And I realized, when I started blogging, that writing is my mental clutter clearing: putting the jumbled thoughts on paper is my way of clearing out the clutter. Kind of like making a list when you have so many things to do you feel like your head is going to explode. Putting it all down on paper helps ease that feeling that your brain is bulging at the seams. At least it does for me.
And this morning my head is a jumble. Some of the words tumbling around today: friendships, relationships, competition, jealousy, caring, laughter, solitude, sharing, withdrawing, understanding, misunderstanding, wanting, fearing, asking, telling, listening, hearing, healing, growing, aging, breathing, thinking, overthinking.
Whew, that feels better.
One of the things I thought I might do as a side business involves helping people get rid of the clutter in their lives. I would call it Organizational Therapy, because it can be therapeutic to get rid of clutter. However, I realized that helping someone get rid of clutter can be a delicate matter. You have to be very aware that their clutter has meaning to them, and getting rid of it can be a slow and sometimes painful process. So, I shelved (pardon the pun) that idea for a business, because I need a better awareness into people's psyche than I actually have.
So, I stick to my own clutter. And I realized, when I started blogging, that writing is my mental clutter clearing: putting the jumbled thoughts on paper is my way of clearing out the clutter. Kind of like making a list when you have so many things to do you feel like your head is going to explode. Putting it all down on paper helps ease that feeling that your brain is bulging at the seams. At least it does for me.
And this morning my head is a jumble. Some of the words tumbling around today: friendships, relationships, competition, jealousy, caring, laughter, solitude, sharing, withdrawing, understanding, misunderstanding, wanting, fearing, asking, telling, listening, hearing, healing, growing, aging, breathing, thinking, overthinking.
Whew, that feels better.
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