I'm a neat person by nature. I've always been a 'picker upper' -- I don't like clutter, it makes me feel muddled and out of control. So, I pick up and put away...a lot. When people come to my home, they usually make some comment about how clean my house is, and I always correct them. Because my house isn't clean; I hate to clean. But I'm usually putting things in their place, which gives the appearance of clean. And I'm okay with that.
One of the things I thought I might do as a side business involves helping people get rid of the clutter in their lives. I would call it Organizational Therapy, because it can be therapeutic to get rid of clutter. However, I realized that helping someone get rid of clutter can be a delicate matter. You have to be very aware that their clutter has meaning to them, and getting rid of it can be a slow and sometimes painful process. So, I shelved (pardon the pun) that idea for a business, because I need a better awareness into people's psyche than I actually have.
So, I stick to my own clutter. And I realized, when I started blogging, that writing is my mental clutter clearing: putting the jumbled thoughts on paper is my way of clearing out the clutter. Kind of like making a list when you have so many things to do you feel like your head is going to explode. Putting it all down on paper helps ease that feeling that your brain is bulging at the seams. At least it does for me.
And this morning my head is a jumble. Some of the words tumbling around today: friendships, relationships, competition, jealousy, caring, laughter, solitude, sharing, withdrawing, understanding, misunderstanding, wanting, fearing, asking, telling, listening, hearing, healing, growing, aging, breathing, thinking, overthinking.
Whew, that feels better.
Lori, I'm smiling because I share this trait of constant picking upping and people say the same thing to me, though I generally allow them to go with the illusion that my house is as clean as it is neat, though it's not.
ReplyDeleteI also understand the writing as clearing, I also do a lot of venting as clearing, as my close friends would attest.
What struck me most about this post was not just the insight you had relevant to the sacredness of another's relationship to their clutter but the list of things rolling around in your head.
I had just been thinking the last few days that I must be the only one whose thoughts went in those directions. Mostly no one speaks of these thoughts to others, though I have, and the reception I've sometimes received was not applause.
It was so healing to me to know that I'm not alone in having some of these thought cluttering up my head.
Glad I could help, Christie :) I think all too often we have similar thoughts but are hesitant to let others in on them for fear of not being understood. It's what I love about blogging (at least, one of the things...)
ReplyDeleteNice post, Lori. I definitely agree about writing as a tool for clearing the mind. It leaves me with a very relaxed, peaceful feeling when I'm done. -Todd
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