Vox Poetica

I've been cyber-published. :) Thanks to a friend, I found Vox Poetica and submitted a few poems. They were deemed worthy of featuring on their site. They chose And so it goes... and Helpless. I've since submitted four poems to another site; we'll see how they do. One result of this is I'm being encouraged by many folks to continue writing. So I'm going to make a more concerted effort to do just that. In fact, I've been invited by a friend to join she and another writer-friend on a writing retreat. I'm really looking forward to it, although I don't force-write very easily. We'll see what percolates. Meanwhile, I'm grateful for the encouragement and support from friends who have read and commented on what I've written so far.

I don't think I'll ever be a full-blown writer, but it's comforting to know that I am, after all, creative. I was asked once by a friend who paints, "What do you create?" And I answered, "Nothing." Now I realize, that's not true. There are many in this town who paint, or sculpt, or play music, or sing. I write. Not for recognition or for money or for art's sake, but for me. It's my cathartic exercise for my brain. It needs the release, especially when I'm overwhelmed with conflicting emotions or by events in the world that are out of my control and yet affect me deeply.

So, I'll keep writing. Hopefully more often. Thanks for reading.

Water

Water.
Put out the fire.
Run for the hills.
Purify it.
Honor it.
Curse it.
Wish it would start.
Wish it would stop.
The river runs with it.
It runs the river over.
Fill the cup.
The cup runneth over.
Not enough here. Too much there.
Heaving. Dripping. Freezing. Melting.
Eight in 24.
2/3 of our whole.
Spring. Bottled. Plastic or metal?
No choice, just bring it.
Bring it from the well.
The well's run dry.
On demand. In demand.
On the brain. On my mind.
It is us. We are it.
Water.

Gratitude List

Things I'm grateful for today:

Grateful that the fire in my neighborhood last night didn't spread, and no one was hurt.

Grateful that my heat pump, covered under the Dominion Heating and Cooling Repair Program, was fixed in a short amount of time and for only $50.

Grateful for my dear daughter, who has gracefully and beautifully entered into her 17th year, and continues to make me proud with her caring, sensitivity, and unique outlook on life.

Grateful for a light workweek, which allowed me to take the time yesterday to take care of said heater *and* enjoy my daughter's birthday with her.

Grateful for friends who understand that life pulls you in different directions, and for the opportunity to catch up with those friends when time allows.

Grateful for the coming of spring, despite a relatively easy winter. Love this time of transition, with buds on trees and plants pushing out a little more with each sunny day.

Worthiness

Related to the previous post; Brene' Brown's words are really helpful for me:

“Our lives are a collection of stories – truths about who we are, what we believe, what we come from, how we struggle, and how we are strong. When we can let go of what people think, and own our story, we gain access to our worthiness – the feeling that we are enough just as we are, and that we are worthy of love and belonging.

If we spend a lifetime trying to distance ourselves from the parts of our lives that don’t fit with who we think we’re supposed to be, we stand outside of our story and have to hustle for our worthiness by constantly performing, perfecting, pleasing, and proving. Our sense of worthiness lives inside of our story. It’s time to walk into our experiences and to start living and loving with our whole hearts.”

You CAN go home...

...and I did it again this weekend. Quick trip to Norfolk to catch up with some childhood and high school friends, and also make some new ones. Going home is always a bittersweet experience. It reconnects me with the places, people,and experiences that are a big part of who I am...very grounding. In that reconnecting, memories are conjured up that aren't always pleasant...sadness over how many have passed, accidents, illnesses. And current trials in life...several in the room had just lost mothers in the past six months. Others are currently going through marital problems. One had just lost his wife to cancer. And yet, looking around the room, I saw smiles, nods, heads thrown back in laughter, faces deep in concentration as they listened to stories, hugs everywhere, exclamations of surprise. It was truly a joyous experience to be in that room.

One of the things I love most about this reconnection is the realization that these people really 'get' me. They know where I came from, they know just how much history we all have together, and they realize the importance of staying connected, of community, of letting go of trivial misunderstandings and differences that once seemed so important. They get that we all have quirks, but they also embrace us despite those quirks, oftentimes because they know what we've been through, how we grew up, what we've had to deal with in life, and that they too are loved and accepted for who they are by the rest of us. In that room that night were differences on many levels, and yet the focus was on the things that have been a part of us for 35 or more years, and that is the good stuff, the stuff that sustains us, and the stuff that makes it so good to go home again.

In the past ten years since I've been in the area I now call home, I've made some wonderful new friends, and I cherish them. But making new friends in mid-life can be a challenge. We often don't give each other the benefit of the doubt, and allow for some wiggle room when our friends make mistakes or don't meet our expectations. They don't really 'know' us or 'get' us in the same way that those who've known us since grade school do. And I think it's a shame that we don't see each other for the complex beings that we are. It's almost like we should all come with a table of contents, with each chapter titled according to the ups and downs of our lives. Rather than assume the worst about each other, we should be assuming the best...assume that we've had influences that shape our very core. We should be listening to each others' stories, not judging the foibles. Cliche' as it is, life is just too effing short to be cutting people out of our lives or holding grudges over petty differences. It makes me sad to watch others do so, but I won't dwell on it. My life is rich in friendships, and so many true blessings, I've determined to focus on those friendships and blessings and continue to move forward, with my feet firmly grounded in the knowledge of who I am, embracing it fully.

Letting Go

Awareness is an amazing thing. If I really, really pay attention to where my thoughts go, I'm so very grateful no one can read them. A real lesson in readjusting my thinking. And part of that process has come from watching others and how they react to negative situations around them. It's true what they say, often when you dislike a quality or characteristic in someone else, it may be that you recognize that very same thing in yourself. The trick is letting yourself acknowledge that, own it, and (if you really don't like it) turn it around. Fascinating. Not easy, but so much more freeing than holding onto resentment, criticism, competitiveness, and negative thinking. Letting go can be so liberating. May it be so!

Look...but don't touch!

Today I'm grateful for our monthly division meeting, which took place at Belmont/Gari Melchers Home and Studio, this morning. We had refreshments (which was awesome, since I missed breakfast this morning...), a talk from Director David Berreth, and a tour of the current exhibit: The New Reality: The Frontier of Realism in the 21st Century.

Wow. Truly stunning. We are so very, very fortunate to have this historical and cultural gem in our area.



It was all I could do not to touch these paintings, the realism unlike anything I've ever seen before. Head on over there. This weekend. You won't regret it.